Gettin Edumacated
Thanks, funkiller, for praying for me and my doubt; currently I'm back in a good place and every time I get there instead of just sitting still I feel something or one pushing me forward...my own personality, God, both...how should my faith translate to action...life is so short, what would be the best way for me to find and use my gifts in the church?
It feels to me like so many years have already been wasted. That's not a fair assessment; in fact, when I consider my depression and the setbacks and challenges in my life I've overcome it's really not fair, but still, I pray that God lets me find and use my gifts, whatever those may be.
One thing I do know is that I want a thorough knowledge of the NT. The primary texts, yes, but the criticism and issues which surround and pervade those texts also. And where do I start? Not online. Not that there aren't good ideas online and smart people writing from all sides of the debate. But as I tell my students, the best sources are still the scholarly ones, books by experts who hae the training and time to delve deep into the topic. And while I'm waiting for my bro's NT-prof buddy to respond, I've taken it on myself to find places to start.
The one thing I already have, and which I'm now trying to read all of (I read a few chapters, was blown away and then went on to other books--I do this often) is N.T. Wright's What St. Paul Really Said. The best literary scholarship, and biblical criticsm is literary scholarship, is that which both reads the text very closely and takes into full account the creation-world of the text. Wright uses extensive knowledge of first century Palestine, of second Temple Judaism, of Paul's own letters, to lay out a beautifully crafted set of essays. I did not realize until I was poking around on Amazon yesterday that this book is controversial, that it is discounted by some because it reinterprets Paul; in fact, Wright's reading of Paul is now called The New Perspective. Nothing worse than cofifying a literary interpretation, but there it is.
I have yet to read all of Wright's little (but packed) book, yet even I've noticed before that Paul's 'faith alone' sermons in the letters were reactions to Judaizers; and, in Paul's idiosyncratic way, radical and not the only thing he said. The fact that the gospels are full of Jesus statements which value and even equate salvation (at least in the parables) with charitable, loving action (call this good works if you want); and that James' letter, whose tradition may lie closer to Jesus' own preaching (though James, according to the NT, was not a believer until after the resurrection) seems to be reacting to how Paul was understood by some...I guess what I'm saying is that none of this bothers me. Those who have written off Wright because he supposedly denies sola fide, salvation by faith alone, have to read the NT docs in their complementary complexity.
Anyway, whatever his pros and cons, Wright is an impressive, thorough, reasonable scholar. And he provides a biography at the end of his little book, with books starred for beginners. It's my goal to begin working through those once I finish his book on Paul, starting with one by David Wenham on Paul and Jesus.
Why do I need to know things? Shouldn't I be out assisting the poor? Yes, I should. I also want to increase charity work in my life; else, what kind of dorkhead faith do I have? Ascetic 'purity,' as in don't cuss or have beer with your cheeseburger or think about sex, and doctrinal 'certainty' as in, yes, I have my terms all memorized...these were my religion as a young person and they fed me about as well as a baby would be fed trying to nurse off my hairy man-chest. Knowledge alone is not reliance on Christ, and it's surely not love. Luckily my little parish in the hills provides me plenty of chances to grow in charity: To serve is to know. But I think, of course, I can be true to who I am and cultivate both components of my Christianity (not that there aren't others in dire need of cultivation, like prayer and meditation in Christ). And the great thing about all this is that it feels natural; I actually feel like I'm finding myself. Thanks be to God. I faked religion for years while trying to be a good boy; how I got to anything genuine really is a miracle. Thanks again, to those who pray for me; I notice changes in my self when I ask for help, often when I forget I've asked for it!
Speaking of good reasons to get on a plane, I am making THIS future goal. How cool is that (you need Adobe reader to view the brochure)? Playing Oxford student for a week and listening to some of the best minds in Christianity? They even take you to the C.S. Lewis house, which is a little creepy, but it would be great to see; hope they don't forget a pub or two he frequented; heck any pub or two would do. England, period, is a place I've wanted to go for twenty five years. Since I began reading Keats in high school. Fear of flying is the main reason I've never been. In the next three or four years, five tops, I plan to stand on the grass next to Wycliffe Hall. How cool is that?
***
I don't have much else going on. Going over to a friend's to watch a little super bowl, and since I'm not that into the game, I'm going mostly to eat his home cooked pork ribs which I am into yum yum. Driving tonight to get Mikey from the airport. Was planning on working out, trying to get regular after last fall when I 'fell' away from exercise, but I'm kinda beat and will probably just go tomorrow morning before work. Teaching Clockwork Orange tomorrow night in sci. fi. What an amazing narrative voice. That novel is underrated in this country.
I have asked God to show me how best to use my gifts for the kingdom: as a layperson, a deacon, a scholar, or, even maybe, as a priest (and whenever I say that one I cringe). I said I wanted direction by listening to my own heart, the input of others, and circumstances. A pretty fair request, think. I am far from impulsive i this life. A quick prayer is also appreciated. I have time and feel short on time all at the same time!
Sincere love and thanks to all who read
It feels to me like so many years have already been wasted. That's not a fair assessment; in fact, when I consider my depression and the setbacks and challenges in my life I've overcome it's really not fair, but still, I pray that God lets me find and use my gifts, whatever those may be.
One thing I do know is that I want a thorough knowledge of the NT. The primary texts, yes, but the criticism and issues which surround and pervade those texts also. And where do I start? Not online. Not that there aren't good ideas online and smart people writing from all sides of the debate. But as I tell my students, the best sources are still the scholarly ones, books by experts who hae the training and time to delve deep into the topic. And while I'm waiting for my bro's NT-prof buddy to respond, I've taken it on myself to find places to start.
The one thing I already have, and which I'm now trying to read all of (I read a few chapters, was blown away and then went on to other books--I do this often) is N.T. Wright's What St. Paul Really Said. The best literary scholarship, and biblical criticsm is literary scholarship, is that which both reads the text very closely and takes into full account the creation-world of the text. Wright uses extensive knowledge of first century Palestine, of second Temple Judaism, of Paul's own letters, to lay out a beautifully crafted set of essays. I did not realize until I was poking around on Amazon yesterday that this book is controversial, that it is discounted by some because it reinterprets Paul; in fact, Wright's reading of Paul is now called The New Perspective. Nothing worse than cofifying a literary interpretation, but there it is.
I have yet to read all of Wright's little (but packed) book, yet even I've noticed before that Paul's 'faith alone' sermons in the letters were reactions to Judaizers; and, in Paul's idiosyncratic way, radical and not the only thing he said. The fact that the gospels are full of Jesus statements which value and even equate salvation (at least in the parables) with charitable, loving action (call this good works if you want); and that James' letter, whose tradition may lie closer to Jesus' own preaching (though James, according to the NT, was not a believer until after the resurrection) seems to be reacting to how Paul was understood by some...I guess what I'm saying is that none of this bothers me. Those who have written off Wright because he supposedly denies sola fide, salvation by faith alone, have to read the NT docs in their complementary complexity.
Anyway, whatever his pros and cons, Wright is an impressive, thorough, reasonable scholar. And he provides a biography at the end of his little book, with books starred for beginners. It's my goal to begin working through those once I finish his book on Paul, starting with one by David Wenham on Paul and Jesus.
Why do I need to know things? Shouldn't I be out assisting the poor? Yes, I should. I also want to increase charity work in my life; else, what kind of dorkhead faith do I have? Ascetic 'purity,' as in don't cuss or have beer with your cheeseburger or think about sex, and doctrinal 'certainty' as in, yes, I have my terms all memorized...these were my religion as a young person and they fed me about as well as a baby would be fed trying to nurse off my hairy man-chest. Knowledge alone is not reliance on Christ, and it's surely not love. Luckily my little parish in the hills provides me plenty of chances to grow in charity: To serve is to know. But I think, of course, I can be true to who I am and cultivate both components of my Christianity (not that there aren't others in dire need of cultivation, like prayer and meditation in Christ). And the great thing about all this is that it feels natural; I actually feel like I'm finding myself. Thanks be to God. I faked religion for years while trying to be a good boy; how I got to anything genuine really is a miracle. Thanks again, to those who pray for me; I notice changes in my self when I ask for help, often when I forget I've asked for it!
Speaking of good reasons to get on a plane, I am making THIS future goal. How cool is that (you need Adobe reader to view the brochure)? Playing Oxford student for a week and listening to some of the best minds in Christianity? They even take you to the C.S. Lewis house, which is a little creepy, but it would be great to see; hope they don't forget a pub or two he frequented; heck any pub or two would do. England, period, is a place I've wanted to go for twenty five years. Since I began reading Keats in high school. Fear of flying is the main reason I've never been. In the next three or four years, five tops, I plan to stand on the grass next to Wycliffe Hall. How cool is that?
***
I don't have much else going on. Going over to a friend's to watch a little super bowl, and since I'm not that into the game, I'm going mostly to eat his home cooked pork ribs which I am into yum yum. Driving tonight to get Mikey from the airport. Was planning on working out, trying to get regular after last fall when I 'fell' away from exercise, but I'm kinda beat and will probably just go tomorrow morning before work. Teaching Clockwork Orange tomorrow night in sci. fi. What an amazing narrative voice. That novel is underrated in this country.
I have asked God to show me how best to use my gifts for the kingdom: as a layperson, a deacon, a scholar, or, even maybe, as a priest (and whenever I say that one I cringe). I said I wanted direction by listening to my own heart, the input of others, and circumstances. A pretty fair request, think. I am far from impulsive i this life. A quick prayer is also appreciated. I have time and feel short on time all at the same time!
Sincere love and thanks to all who read
Comments
Keep searching, friend.